Aku baru balik sini pagi tadi sebab esok dah kerja. Alhamdulillah, perjalanan smooth kali ni, tak de orang annoying but I'm already homesick, I miss my mum. Lepas aku sampai rumah, aku terus tidur. Then I woke up with a throbbing headache, maybe because I slept in the wrong position. Nasib baiklah aku ada paracetamol lagi walaupun bukan Panadol, kalau tak, aku kena bertahan sampai esok pagi.
Entahlah tapi hari ni, aku rasa sedih. Actually, I've been feeling like this lately.
First of all, I know it's gonna take sometime before I start seeing the result (I've been working out and practising mindful eating) tapi aku dah tak confident macam masa berat aku 50+. Aku benci tengok gambar aku sendiri. Bila nak ambil gambar, kena ambil from certain angle baru tak nampak double chin. I don't mind a bit of double chin sebab aku tak suka jawline yang tajam.
This brings me to my second point and that is, I envy my crush. I know this isn't entirely true but he seems like he's got it all to me. He's good-looking, he's got a banging body, he's got money, he's perfect and I'm the opposite of him, I'm fat, I'm broke. I wish I could be him or like him. I know I should be thankful for what I've got but I can't help it.
Last but not least, dekat tempat kerja aku sekarang, aku dapat boss puaka and it makes me sad sebab aku ingat, I'd been through the worst masa dekat uni dulu (classmates bodoh sombong, jahat, kampung) and things would get better but now it's the same freaking thing all over again. Bilalah hidup aku would actually get better...
