I don't know how to start. I thought I'd reveal this after I'm done "working" here but I'm sick and tired of treading a tightrope. I just wanna be 100% honest while being anonymous. I don't know if this is the right thing to do and I might regret it later on, if someone somehow manages to find out my identity but if that happens, I guess I'd just delete this post or this blog, if that's what it'd take but I think it's unlikely anyone who knows me would find out it's me because I don't think there's anyone who reads this blog but even if there is, I don't think they'd be able to figure out who I am. I'm not underestimating people, I just pray and hope for the best. Anyway, here we go.
The truth is, I'm not working. I'm actually a student at a university which I shan't tell what the name is but I shall tell once I've graduated, inshallah. All I can tell for now is, it's one of the top three universities in Malaysia. I'm not proud at all because I still think UiTM is better than this university despite people trashing UiTM while praising this university. I'm not saying it's all bad, I just don't get how it's one of the top three universities when UiTM is better than it.
Anyway, the reason I changed the details in past posts is I don't want anyone who knows me to expose me. I've mentioned in the first post, I've started blogging since 2009 and my schoolmates leaked my blog to everyone. Everyone started talking about it and making assumptions about me to the point where I had to make it private. Ever since then, I've been doing what I can to not let anyone track me down. I'm not a confrontational person but that doesn't mean I'm a coward, I just prioritise my inner peace. Also, I don't consider this as lying, I consider this as covering my tracks. If I was a liar, I'd be making up stories but all the stories I've told in this blog are 100% true, I don't lie about my age, I am in my 20s and I hate liars. I admit I do exaggerate sometimes for a dramatic effect but I know that's a bad habit and I try not to do that. Kudos to bloggers who don't hide behind anonymity but honestly speaking, I don't think it's a wise thing to do.
So, as a heads-up, if you read my past posts, bear in mind I changed some details like names, gender, places and so on. I used to write quotation marks round details I changed but then I got tired of doing it. From now on, I'll no longer change the details but I'll still change the details like names and gender, not only to protect my anonymity but at the same time, to protect the identity of the subject matter. Yes, I talk about people who've wronged me but I don't expose them because I don't wanna be exposed.
I'm sorry if anyone who reads this blog, if there's any, feels misled or lied to, I understand where you're coming from but that's not what I intended. My intention of writing this blog is I hope my writings will make anyone out there who reads this blog feel less alone in whatever they're going through because I've been there and I know the feeling.
So, to whoever comes across this blog, don't give up, no matter how hard it gets because God is powerful over all things and this too shall pass and everything will eventually get better.
