I wish I could tell you, I got another job, and I get paid (at least) RM4,000 every month, and I'm happy with my new job and my life, but sadly, I'm not there yet. I'm still stuck here, with my depressing, miserable, overworked and underpaid job. It's so not fair, after everything I've been through.
I try to stay strong, for myself and for my mum, but at times, especially at nights, I break down. Sometimes it feels just too much. My mum and some of my friends know this, because I've confided in them, but I don't wanna burden them with my problems, it's not fair for them, so I keep stuff to myself.
I don't care about what my enemies think but I know, if they know about this, they'd be laughing and clapping. They did shits to me, they made me go through shitty times, so, if they know I'm in a shithole now? They won. I can admit my defeat and they can have their pathetic sense of victory.
That's one of the reasons I haven't given up. I'm not ready to give up even though I get violently washed by ferocious waves, over and over again, hardly without rest. I may be defeated now but I still believe, by the grace of God, I will emerge victorious, some day. Not today, not tomorrow, but some day.
God is fair and just. He won't let my sufferings go unnoticed and unrewarded. I didn't suffer for nothing. I've been through the worst times of my life, and this is just another one, and this too, shall pass. Yes, I'm tired, I'm scared but my dreams and hopes, of a better life, of a place I can call home, keep me going.
